Friday, August 22, 2008


Hey y'all. I have moved to Wordpress. This is officially my last post here.

As most of you know I am going through a lot of changes in my life right now. I felt in keeping with that motif it was time to change my blog as well. I have heard a great many things about wordpress and I am excited to learn my way around. I am leaving my new url and I do so hope you will follow me over.

Thanks, everyone.

Here you go...

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Operation Knocked Up...

Negatory, Ghost Rider, the pattern is full.

Well. Did you really expect it to happen so soon? And with the living at the 'Rents house? In my old bedroom across the hall? Sharing a room with the boys?

There's always next month. I would say wish me luck, but I am not sure what it is I should be wished. Fertility? Stamina? Bendiness? TMI?

Whatever it is, wish it to me. I got a powerful hankerin' for another baby.

Edited to add- According to the Chinese Lunar calendar, I need to become pregnant later this month in order for it to be a girl. Which is theoretically possible. No pressure.

Otherwise I have to wait until APRIL of 2009 for my next chance at having a girl. Jeez. Anyone else have any other methods,ideas they would be willing to share? I really want a girl this time.

Question Of The Day...

What in the sam hill has happened to gymnastics that a gymnast who lands ON HER KNEES after her event WINS THE FRICKIN' GOLD MEDAL? Excuse me? Correct me if I am wrong, but I have always held the belief that the Olympics were the Creme De la Creme of the sporting world. To win an Olympic gold medal meant that you were the very best there was in your specific sport.

Unless you are, apparently, a gymnast. Then you can do whatever you want and still have more than a snowball's chance in hell to win a medal. I also am more than a little miffed that they no longer have the scoring system in which a perfect ten can be awarded. Then what is the point? Everyone remembers how exciting it was to watch Mary Lou Retton receive that perfect score. You were on the edge of your seat, breath held, just waiting and praying, and then Blammo! She did it! This new scoring system? Bah. It takes too long and allows for waaaaaay too many errors. My personal favorite being the judges. You can no longer have a judge from your nation scoring your event. Well, that sucks. Who didn't love watching the scores to see if the judges played fast and loose with their own team? It was expected. And as only one score out of many it didn't hold that much weight. So bring it back.

All in all I am quite proud of our athletes. They showed good sportsmanship and remarkable class even after getting ripped off. These games have been a lulu. But, as always, I will be sad to see them end. I look forward to the Winter Olympics in 2010. I also am looking forward to getting some much needed sleep. And maybe watching non-Olympic television! Oh! I almost forgot. Major kudos to all the news media for not giving away any secrets. I love that! Thanks, y'all!

One more thing? If those girls are sixteen? I will kiss the collective internets ass. One at a time.

Monday, August 18, 2008

The Downside To Pre-K...

All those germy, little beasts. Spreading their delicious little germs to everything and everyone. Germs! Galore! Germy-germ factory.

That's right, the Nub has brought the Plague of Death to his poor Bubba and his beloved Mama. Although the beloved part is now in serious doubt... It is awful, truly awful. There is hacking and absolute rivers of neon green snot.Fevers and supreme grouchiness are the orders of the day.

And that's just me. Ba-dum, dum-dum. Sorry, it cried out for me to do that.

Back to the sickness. Fortunately, we still have some of the cough medicine their Doctor prescribed the last time they were this sick.It's good stuff. As for moi? I am taking OTC goodies by the truckload. I still feel like crap, but it's more headachey than anything else. And my throat feels like someone has recently grated the hell out of it. Other than that? Good times.

And now I am off to the kitchen. The least germiest beast has woken up and is demanding cinnamon toast. Or there will be consequences.

Saturday, August 16, 2008

That's Ms. Bitchy McBitcherson To You...

Jeebus. I'm not even sure where to start. Umm, maybe with the Geico Gecko...

Anyone else wishing for a big, screechy hawk(or eagle)to come swooping out of the sky and snatch that little annoying bastard right up?Thereby snapping his weaselly spine in the process and also inflicting unspeakable pain upon him? Anyone?


What do the words "freshly laundered and laid flat in a laundry basket(or something comparable), fall and winter clothing only, please limit it to ONE basket per visit" mean to you? Do they mean throw them in a garbage bag? Without washing them. Or maybe bring in your entire house? Again, without washing one damn thing. I honestly am just about done with the sheer stupidity of some of these people. What really kills me is when they call to ask what the procedures are before coming to the store. And then don't follow a single one of them. I also enjoy being bitched out for not taking spotted or smelly clothing. That's my favorite. Especially when they get all offended.


Living with your parents.


Not being able to watch my shows. Oh wait, that goes with the last one.


I miss my girlfriends. I don't get to see them nearly as much right now. My mother doesn't believe that I should have any sort of a social life. After all, I am a mama now. Mama's don't do that. And by social life? I mean any sort of social life. Right before my last knee surgery Jimmy and I had made a date to go to dinner and bowling with my BFF and her Honey. My mom was going to keep the boys overnight. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge. Yeah, she let us know that they would NOT be keeping them overnight after all as we were dropping them off. Good times. Fast forward to the next time I made plans to go out with my BFF to celebrate a little thing I like to call her COLLEGE GRADUATION. A minor event in a person's life. Two hours before I was set to meet her, my mom backed out. Her reason? She forgot. Even though I had reminded her every day. For. A. Week. Bah.

I am still mad.


And now I am done. I think. I do reserve the right to add to this later. I am going to relax and read one of the bajillion books I picked up whilst Yard Sale-ing yesterday. Y'all remind me to tell you all about the Steal 'o' The Century. Truly.

Monday, August 11, 2008

Tired Is As Tired Does...

There is so much stuff going on right now. And not just the Olympics.

I may, and or may not, have escaped death today. Well, I did obviously escape it. Duh, I am writing about my experience. But as to whether I would have actually died, well, who really knows? Here is the story...

My parent's have long been loyal DirecTv subscribers. For like fifteen years. Loved them. Until our trees grew and blocked their signal. Not so much love after that. They call up good ol' Customer Service only to be told there was nothing that could be done. Short of cutting down the tree(heresy) or paying to have DirecTv come out and re-position the satellite(so not gonna happen). So they shut off DirecTv. I know. It was just about as painful as it sounds. I mention that they should switch to Dish. We had it and absolutely loved it. Nary a problem. So they decide to give it a whirl. Only it will take about two weeks to have it installed. Again with the knowing.

Fast forward two weeks to today. My father gets a wild hair and decides he needs a new tv. A flat screen. He sends Mama and I out to search for a good deal. We hit K-Mart, hhgregg(which is a whole 'nother post) and finally, Wal-Marts. We chose to go with the Sanyo from Wal-Marts. Only ours didn't have it. So we had to drive to the next town to pick it up. And here is where the almost dying part comes in to play.

We are driving down the interstate and it starts to sound funny. Like a helicopter is hovering right above me. Thwup-thwup-thwup-thwup. I can't figure out what the hell is making that noise, but nothing is wonky with my car. And we are almost there and at that point I just honestly wanted to stop the car and see what was wrong with it. We get the tv and come back out. I don't see anything wrong with the car. So we get back in it. And the noise is worse. But we have Dub in the car with us and it is hot. I figure if I go slow and am really careful, we can make it home. And we do,thankyoujeebus. All I have to do now is wait for my husband to get home and take a look at it.

I go to work. Typical day, people are idiots, it's hot, blah, blah. I come home and go see if he has figured out what the problem was. He had. Back when I had my tires done they, apparently,did not put my lug nuts back on correctly. Or even tightly. One of them is gone. As in no longer there. Three of them are sliced in half.That leaves me with one. One lug nut holding my tire on it's rim.One. I am very lucky I wasn't in a massive wreck. My husband was slightly shaken up by the thought of what almost happened.

Now? He is very,very angry. I will be calling the Tire Company first thing in the morning. I don't want this to happen to someone else. And now,if y'all will excuse me, I am going to bed. Almost being killed really makes you quite tired.

Friday, August 8, 2008

True Story...

I am watching the Olympics. I am also on the internets. It's called multi-tasking. I am good at it. So I am looking for something and I see a headline about Christina Applegate having cancer. I freak out a little bit because I have always liked her a lot. I go to the site and read the story and heave a big ol' sigh of relief. You know, us being all BFF-y and such. I then see that Paul Newman may have weeks to live. So I read I that story. Speculation, no confirmation,blah-blah. Then at the bottom is this comment.

"Paul, you are in my prayers. You remind me so much of my uncle and I have always respected you as an actor and a salad dressing." by an anonymous person on the site.

The first part was just sweet. And then I read the last bit and got hysterical. I can't stop laughing. I mean really. How inappropriate can you be?

Who the hell comes up with this stuff? Better yet, is this person serious?

That's all you can think of to say? What a wack-a-doo.

The Monkey...

The Monkey...