The Princess of Quite A Lot

Good-bye...

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Fri, 22 Aug 2008 12:49:00 +0000

Hey y'all. I have moved to Wordpress. This is officially my last post here.

As most of you know I am going through a lot of changes in my life right now. I felt in keeping with that motif it was time to change my blog as well. I have heard a great many things about wordpress and I am excited to learn my way around. I am leaving my new url and I do so hope you will follow me over.

Thanks, everyone.

Here you go...http://www.theprincessofquitealot2.wordpress.com.

Operation Knocked Up...

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Wed, 20 Aug 2008 03:36:00 +0000

Negatory, Ghost Rider, the pattern is full.

Well. Did you really expect it to happen so soon? And with the living at the 'Rents house? In my old bedroom across the hall? Sharing a room with the boys?

There's always next month. I would say wish me luck, but I am not sure what it is I should be wished. Fertility? Stamina? Bendiness? TMI?

Whatever it is, wish it to me. I got a powerful hankerin' for another baby.

Edited to add- According to the Chinese Lunar calendar, I need to become pregnant later this month in order for it to be a girl. Which is theoretically possible. No pressure.

Otherwise I have to wait until APRIL of 2009 for my next chance at having a girl. Jeez. Anyone else have any other methods,ideas they would be willing to share? I really want a girl this time.

Question Of The Day...

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Tue, 19 Aug 2008 13:47:00 +0000

What in the sam hill has happened to gymnastics that a gymnast who lands ON HER KNEES after her event WINS THE FRICKIN' GOLD MEDAL? Excuse me? Correct me if I am wrong, but I have always held the belief that the Olympics were the Creme De la Creme of the sporting world. To win an Olympic gold medal meant that you were the very best there was in your specific sport.

Unless you are, apparently, a gymnast. Then you can do whatever you want and still have more than a snowball's chance in hell to win a medal. I also am more than a little miffed that they no longer have the scoring system in which a perfect ten can be awarded. Then what is the point? Everyone remembers how exciting it was to watch Mary Lou Retton receive that perfect score. You were on the edge of your seat, breath held, just waiting and praying, and then Blammo! She did it! This new scoring system? Bah. It takes too long and allows for waaaaaay too many errors. My personal favorite being the judges. You can no longer have a judge from your nation scoring your event. Well, that sucks. Who didn't love watching the scores to see if the judges played fast and loose with their own team? It was expected. And as only one score out of many it didn't hold that much weight. So bring it back.

All in all I am quite proud of our athletes. They showed good sportsmanship and remarkable class even after getting ripped off. These games have been a lulu. But, as always, I will be sad to see them end. I look forward to the Winter Olympics in 2010. I also am looking forward to getting some much needed sleep. And maybe watching non-Olympic television! Oh! I almost forgot. Major kudos to all the news media for not giving away any secrets. I love that! Thanks, y'all!

One more thing? If those girls are sixteen? I will kiss the collective internets ass. One at a time.

The Downside To Pre-K...

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 12:46:00 +0000

All those germy, little beasts. Spreading their delicious little germs to everything and everyone. Germs! Galore! Germy-germ factory.

That's right, the Nub has brought the Plague of Death to his poor Bubba and his beloved Mama. Although the beloved part is now in serious doubt... It is awful, truly awful. There is hacking and absolute rivers of neon green snot.Fevers and supreme grouchiness are the orders of the day.

And that's just me. Ba-dum, dum-dum. Sorry, it cried out for me to do that.

Back to the sickness. Fortunately, we still have some of the cough medicine their Doctor prescribed the last time they were this sick.It's good stuff. As for moi? I am taking OTC goodies by the truckload. I still feel like crap, but it's more headachey than anything else. And my throat feels like someone has recently grated the hell out of it. Other than that? Good times.

And now I am off to the kitchen. The least germiest beast has woken up and is demanding cinnamon toast. Or there will be consequences.

That's Ms. Bitchy McBitcherson To You...

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Sun, 17 Aug 2008 00:14:00 +0000

Jeebus. I'm not even sure where to start. Umm, maybe with the Geico Gecko...

Anyone else wishing for a big, screechy hawk(or eagle)to come swooping out of the sky and snatch that little annoying bastard right up?Thereby snapping his weaselly spine in the process and also inflicting unspeakable pain upon him? Anyone?

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What do the words "freshly laundered and laid flat in a laundry basket(or something comparable), fall and winter clothing only, please limit it to ONE basket per visit" mean to you? Do they mean throw them in a garbage bag? Without washing them. Or maybe bring in your entire house? Again, without washing one damn thing. I honestly am just about done with the sheer stupidity of some of these people. What really kills me is when they call to ask what the procedures are before coming to the store. And then don't follow a single one of them. I also enjoy being bitched out for not taking spotted or smelly clothing. That's my favorite. Especially when they get all offended.

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Living with your parents.

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Not being able to watch my shows. Oh wait, that goes with the last one.

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I miss my girlfriends. I don't get to see them nearly as much right now. My mother doesn't believe that I should have any sort of a social life. After all, I am a mama now. Mama's don't do that. And by social life? I mean any sort of social life. Right before my last knee surgery Jimmy and I had made a date to go to dinner and bowling with my BFF and her Honey. My mom was going to keep the boys overnight. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge. Yeah, she let us know that they would NOT be keeping them overnight after all as we were dropping them off. Good times. Fast forward to the next time I made plans to go out with my BFF to celebrate a little thing I like to call her COLLEGE GRADUATION. A minor event in a person's life. Two hours before I was set to meet her, my mom backed out. Her reason? She forgot. Even though I had reminded her every day. For. A. Week. Bah.

I am still mad.

************************

And now I am done. I think. I do reserve the right to add to this later. I am going to relax and read one of the bajillion books I picked up whilst Yard Sale-ing yesterday. Y'all remind me to tell you all about the Steal 'o' The Century. Truly.

Tired Is As Tired Does...

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Tue, 12 Aug 2008 02:10:00 +0000

There is so much stuff going on right now. And not just the Olympics.

I may, and or may not, have escaped death today. Well, I did obviously escape it. Duh, I am writing about my experience. But as to whether I would have actually died, well, who really knows? Here is the story...

My parent's have long been loyal DirecTv subscribers. For like fifteen years. Loved them. Until our trees grew and blocked their signal. Not so much love after that. They call up good ol' Customer Service only to be told there was nothing that could be done. Short of cutting down the tree(heresy) or paying to have DirecTv come out and re-position the satellite(so not gonna happen). So they shut off DirecTv. I know. It was just about as painful as it sounds. I mention that they should switch to Dish. We had it and absolutely loved it. Nary a problem. So they decide to give it a whirl. Only it will take about two weeks to have it installed. Again with the knowing.

Fast forward two weeks to today. My father gets a wild hair and decides he needs a new tv. A flat screen. He sends Mama and I out to search for a good deal. We hit K-Mart, hhgregg(which is a whole 'nother post) and finally, Wal-Marts. We chose to go with the Sanyo from Wal-Marts. Only ours didn't have it. So we had to drive to the next town to pick it up. And here is where the almost dying part comes in to play.

We are driving down the interstate and it starts to sound funny. Like a helicopter is hovering right above me. Thwup-thwup-thwup-thwup. I can't figure out what the hell is making that noise, but nothing is wonky with my car. And we are almost there and at that point I just honestly wanted to stop the car and see what was wrong with it. We get the tv and come back out. I don't see anything wrong with the car. So we get back in it. And the noise is worse. But we have Dub in the car with us and it is hot. I figure if I go slow and am really careful, we can make it home. And we do,thankyoujeebus. All I have to do now is wait for my husband to get home and take a look at it.

I go to work. Typical day, people are idiots, it's hot, blah, blah. I come home and go see if he has figured out what the problem was. He had. Back when I had my tires done they, apparently,did not put my lug nuts back on correctly. Or even tightly. One of them is gone. As in no longer there. Three of them are sliced in half.That leaves me with one. One lug nut holding my tire on it's rim.One. I am very lucky I wasn't in a massive wreck. My husband was slightly shaken up by the thought of what almost happened.

Now? He is very,very angry. I will be calling the Tire Company first thing in the morning. I don't want this to happen to someone else. And now,if y'all will excuse me, I am going to bed. Almost being killed really makes you quite tired.

True Story...

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Sat, 09 Aug 2008 03:03:00 +0000

I am watching the Olympics. I am also on the internets. It's called multi-tasking. I am good at it. So I am looking for something and I see a headline about Christina Applegate having cancer. I freak out a little bit because I have always liked her a lot. I go to the site and read the story and heave a big ol' sigh of relief. You know, us being all BFF-y and such. I then see that Paul Newman may have weeks to live. So I read I that story. Speculation, no confirmation,blah-blah. Then at the bottom is this comment.

"Paul, you are in my prayers. You remind me so much of my uncle and I have always respected you as an actor and a salad dressing." by an anonymous person on the hollywood.com site.

The first part was just sweet. And then I read the last bit and got hysterical. I can't stop laughing. I mean really. How inappropriate can you be?

Who the hell comes up with this stuff? Better yet, is this person serious?

That's all you can think of to say? What a wack-a-doo.

Can't Talk Now, Part Deux...

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Sat, 09 Aug 2008 02:33:00 +0000

V. busy watching the Opening Ceremonies of the 2008 Summer Olympics...

One of my most favoritest things ever.

Good luck, Athletes!

Back to School...

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Wed, 06 Aug 2008 14:01:00 +0000

It is officially all official-like, or would that be official-ish? Huh?

You will have to excuse my lack of coherent thought. Or any sort of thought, for that matter. I am getting up early these days. To take Nub to pre-K.

And it is killing me dead. No, really. DEAD.

Okay, the italics are off. Every morning we wake up at 7:15 and begin our day. Thankfully we do not have to begin it with breakfast because, dude, he eats at school. How rockin' is that?Love it! Dub and I drop him off and then come back home. Did I mention that his school is literally right down the street? So it take less than two minutes to drive there? No? That is also rockin'. But only for another few weeks. Then it will be about five minutes away. Still. That's not too shabby either.

I must admit the proximity of his school to my parent's house, or where we were hoping to move, did play a small part in the choosing of the pre-K. That and the fact that the school has been in business for over thirty years and I have NEVER heard anyone say one bad thing about it. Not one. I love it. I love his teacher. I love the room he is in. I love the curriculum. And more importantly? He loves it. He has already made some friends. Isn't that sweet?

We are one small step away from birthday parties, spending the night and all of the chaos that comes with the territory of boyhood. I can't wait. He is so adventurous. He just goes running full tilt to the next thing. I hope he never loses that.

My big boy. So grown up.

Question of the Day...

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Tue, 05 Aug 2008 15:01:00 +0000

Technically, can it still be referred to as baby weight if the baby will be three years old next month?

Skip Caray:1939-2008...

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Mon, 04 Aug 2008 17:28:00 +0000

The baseball world lost an amazing voice yesterday with the passing of Skip Caray. I am finding myself at a loss for words today. Something that is quite unusual for me. I am deeply saddened by his death.

We never met. But I felt like I knew him anyway. Something tells me he got that a lot. You all know how much I love baseball, whether it be televised, in person or on the radio. It makes no difference to me. I just love it. So did he.

I have often mentioned to my father just how much I enjoyed listening to him call a game. There was no one finer. And now there is only Chip Caray. His son. Who has a quite a pair of shoes to fill...

I believe him to be up to the task...

Why Starch Is No Longer My BFF...

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Sat, 02 Aug 2008 00:38:00 +0000

Or, Sweet-Baby-Jesus-Don't-Make-Me-Eat-Anymore-Starchy-Foods...

Take your pick. Anyway you cut it, boil it, bake it, fry it, whatev, I am DONE.

My beloved husband is considering divorcing my ass if I continue to eat starch. Not really. But I would not blame him one bit if he did. I am, how shall I put it, a bit gaseous. And, um, slightly stinky. Well, hell. If I can't talk about it to you guys, who do I tell? Anyhoo. It's pretty bad. Really bad.

I don't really have any idea how to broach the subject with Mummy Dearest. She has always prided herself on being a good cook. And she is. Truly. But if I eat another potato I may throw myself off the deck. The thing is? My Diddy will only eat certain veggies. Potato's being one of them. I know. It makes me nuts.

Why don't I cook, you ask? Because my Diddy doesn't really care for what I cook. He doesn't say so in so many words, but I can sorta tell. I use a lot of olive oil and fresh garlic in my cooking. I also make a lot of things he will not eat. Things involving turkey sausage, fresh veggies, whole wheat pasta, etc. We generally eat healthier food. We like lots of fresh fruits and veggies. I fry nothing. I am the opposite of my mother in the kitchen in every way. The one night I did cook? Was okay. The boys loved it. But I didn't feel like it would be something I would be doing again while we were here.

Which really sucks. I miss cooking. Very much. I am already planning the things I will be making the first week in our new place. And the good news is that that looks like it will be happening sooner than we thought. Like maybe in the next few weeks. We are going to look next weekend. If everything goes as planned, we will be moving at the end of the month.

Keep your fingers crossed. And maybe your toes, too.

Can't Talk...

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Thu, 31 Jul 2008 01:28:00 +0000

V. busy playing Mobsters on MySpace.

What? I am kicking some serious ass and takin' names...

I will return tomorrow.

GUESS WHAT?

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Tue, 29 Jul 2008 02:53:00 +0000

I WON MY VERY FIRST PiF CONTEST!

That's right, baby! I WON! WOO-HOO, WOO-HOO, WOO-HOO.

Okay. I'm done. And now feeling slightly guilty that I haven't sent off the package to my first PiF winner. I know, I suck. It has been sitting in the back of my van for over a week. Because I keep putting off going to the Post Office. Only because I have to take the boys inside with me. Yeah. Not so much. But I am going to. Because I do feel bad. And slacky. And bad.

Anyhoo, back to being a WINNER. Misty over at http://mistyatourhouse.blogspot.com/ held her own PiF after winning one she entered and I won it! Confused? I am, a little.

But I WON!

I will keep y'all posted. And calm down.

Things That Have Gone The Way Of The Dodo...

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Fri, 25 Jul 2008 13:36:00 +0000

They say that after you have a child your life will never be the same. That is absolutely one hundred percent true. And almost ninety-eight percent of that is all warm and fuzzy and gooey deliciousness.

The other two percent? Not so much. No one tells you about the other two percent. So I have decided to take it upon myself to let you know all about what you can expect to miss. At least according to me, that is. Let us begin.

* The very first thing I began to miss was the ability to sleep on my tummy. Sometime after the first trimester it begins to be rather uncomfortable. I liken it to trying to sleep on top of a personal watermelon. You know? Those mini ones? Plus, it just feels like you are crushing the baby. Not very maternal.

* The second thing I miss,to this day,would be my old bladder. Sigh. My old bladder was a champ. Undefeated in his weight. Impressive, no? The new bladder? Let's just say that he cannot handle any of my Diddy's funnier jokes. And yes, I know all about Kegels. I am the Kegel Queen. Wait, that sounded a little dirty. Let me rephrase that. I do a lot of Kegels. It ain't helpin' me not to pee my pants when I really get to laughing. That's all I'm saying.

* Another thing that leaves pretty quickly? Your brain. No lie. Kiss it good-bye. You will find yourself forgetting the word for, let's just use this as an example, cat. It certainly did not happen to me. Nor did it involve any sort of charades to try and make her bonehead husband understand just what in the Sam Hill she was talking about, thankyouverymuch.

* While we are being all Share-y McShare-pants, I miss my sex drive. If anyone has seen her, send her slutty ass home. Who has the time for the sex? No, really. That is a legitimate question.

*The " Good Ol' Days ". Being able to sleep in. Or just sleep through the night without having to get up. I'm not greedy. I would make do with either.

* A little thing I used to call privacy. You may refer to it as being able to go to the bathroom in peace. And by yourself, for that matter. Nothing says "love" like a little voice asking what you are doing while you are trying to do your bidness.

* And last, but certainly not least, my sanity. I don't really think that needs much explanation. If you have children. If you don't, call me. I will go in to detail.

Now, having said all that, let me say this. I love being a Mama. More than anything in the whole, wide world. But there are days I would like to run off and join the circus just for the break.

Thankfully,those days are few and far between.

Dude!

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 14:09:00 +0000

How long have I had this blog? A year? Year and a half?

I just now figured out how to add my picture. No lie.

What a maroon...

The Best Part of My Day...

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Tue, 22 Jul 2008 01:29:00 +0000

My day did not start off so well this morning. I ended up having to drive my husband to work at the ungodly hour of six thirty. Bah. Work was work. Except towards the end. When this beeyotch made me get a frickity-frackin' TRAVEL SYSTEM off the top shelf in the toy area. Because she wanted to look at it. Never mind that it weighed three million pounds. Or that I had to stand on a LADDER to get it. Oh hells no. Then, and here is the kicker, SHE DECIDES NOT TO GET IT. Wait for it. Because the cup holder on the top of the stroller was dirty.

Pissed does not even begin to cover just how angry I was. Still am. Monkeys will fly out of my ass before I lift one finger to ever help her again. Truly.

But the very best part of my day? Watching my boys "dance" to Louis Armstrong. And the rest of the songs on my dad's Ken Burns Jazz CD set. They love it. They love all music really. It gives my father a kick to be able to share his love of music with my children.

Just like he did with me and my Bubba all those years ago.

Forkaphobia...

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 15:13:00 +0000

I don't actually know if that is a real phobia, but we will pretend it is. I've tried looking it up to no avail. Does anyone know if it is a phobia? Anyone? Bueller?

It is another one of my "family jokes". I know. I have a lot of 'em. What can I say. We are a funny family. Don't be haters. Back to the story...

My father loves to run things in to the ground. And stomp on them. And then maybe jump up and down on 'em for good measure. When that happens and we no longer feel like humoring him we say " Okay, you're done. Stick a fork in it". This has been going on for years. Last night I decided to take it one step further. He was rambling on about something that was so no longer funny. I got up, walked in to the kitchen and grabbed a fork from the siverware drawer. Then I walked back in to the living room and stood by the couch until I had his attention. And handed him the fork. The look on his face was priceless. He later told me that he could not believe his only daughter would be so cruel. To which I replied that he was just jealous that he had never thought of it. Which was true. Which then led to the discussion of phobias( see why I never explain my stories?!).

Since I also love running things in to the ground I decided that I needed to make him a t-shirt with the definition of forkaphobia on it! Wouldn't that be the funniest thing ever? I need to come up with a better name first. Anyone got any ideas? Lemme know. I'm off tomorrow and plan on heading up to Michael's.

Because I also plan on making one for my Bubba. Hee hee. But I can't write what I'm going to put on it because his girlfriend reads my blog. But it is FUNNY! After I make the t-shirts I will try to post a picture of them.

I'd Only Ever Seen Him On The Radio...

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Sun, 20 Jul 2008 02:53:00 +0000

Don't even ask about the title. It's a rather embarrassing remark I made whilst watching the Braves game with my Diddy. It's a long story that will no longer be even remotely funny by the time I get through explaining it to you all.

Unless you are my Bubba. Then it would probably still be funny.

Let's just say it will go down in our family archives as,quite possibly, one of the dumbest things I have ever said. Not the dumbest. We already had a winner for that title. Years ago. But it is definitely up there. Hoo boy.

And on that note, I am going to bed. It's been a very long day.

Did You Know?

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 13:14:00 +0000

************ possible TMI alert ************

Hi! Here's an interesting tidbit I found out on Tuesday morning...

When having your IUD removed it is ADVISED to ABSTAIN FROM THE SEX FOR THE ENTIRE WEEK PRIOR TO SAID REMOVAL. Because with the IUD most women don't have a period. Or if you're like me, it's every six weeks-ish for about an hour. Ovulation who? So on the off chance you are ovulating before the removal, come to Mama!

WTF?!SERIOUSLY?!

I'm thinking that might be an important smidge of information that a person's OB/GYN might need to mention beforehand. So certain people don't decide to win one for the Gipper, if you catch my drift.

Jeebus.

I could very well already BE pregnant. I'm just waiting for my husband to confirm or the arrival of good ol' Aunt Flo. Either way it's gonna be one hell of a couple weeks!

**** edited to add ****
Flo has arrived, thankyouverymuch. I would have been excited to have already been pregnant, but it would have sucked some of the fun right on out of it. You know?

Operation Knocked Up...

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 01:51:00 +0000

************ possible TMI alert ************

It is official. I went to my OB/GYN this afternoon and had my IUD removed. We now have the green light, as it were, to begin making another baby. Our third baby. Can I get a WOOT!WOOT! ?

Well, not actually tonight. I am a little crampy and uncomfortable. Maybe tomorrow. On the bright side? It does not hurt at all to have it removed. In fact it literally took about two minutes. Seriously.

So now we wait.

And maybe begin discussing baby names. Or is that too soon?

Week 3...

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Mon, 14 Jul 2008 15:40:00 +0000

It's not going so well. I am very angry with my mother. I resent being treated like I am still in high school. It is really pissing me off and making it very difficult for me to remain civil. I am a grown woman. So is she for that matter. Jeebus...

My husband deserves some sort of medal. Or something. He has the patience of Job. Truly. He has always been sort of quiet towards my parents. Us living here has not cured him of that habit. He spends a lot of time with the boys outside or in our room.

We are just ready to be back in our own place. The kids are okay. The excitement has kinda worn off now. They don't really have anywhere that is their own space. Plus, if something is on that my parents want to watch,then they can't be in the living room.

I feel so stifled and resentful. I keep telling myself that it is only for a little while longer and "serenity now, serenity now", but I don't know how much longer I can bite my tongue. I am on the verge of exploding. And to make matters worse? I am off work tonight. Yikes.

Serenity now, serenity now...

25 Things You Always Wanted To Know...

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Mon, 14 Jul 2008 03:37:00 +0000

Yeah, I know it's kind of a cop out. I'm tired of listening to myself complain. Enjoy....

1- I am a total francophile.
2- I love to watch commercials.
3- I don't really understand texting.
4- I love MySpace far more than I should. Far more.
5- I am nervous about having another child. Excited, but still a little terrified.
6- I am mad with the Atlanta Falcons. I no longer heart them. Geaux Saints!
7- I have replaced "moot point" with "moo point". What? It's a cow's opinion!!
8- I say "whatev" because I know it gets on my husbands nerves.
9- I would rather take a nap than just about anything.
10- I have a green thumb.
11- I drink far too much soda.
12- I can make really killer lasagna.
13- I still sleep with my body pillow from my prior pregnancies. What? I love that thing!
14- I still have quite a potty mouth.
15- I put syrup on my cornbread.
16- I pretty much wear flip-flops year round.
17- I love everything about the Olympics.
18- I like to watch beauty pageants with my parents.
19- I am still computer challenged.
20- I have a bizarre sense of humor.
21- I love nothing more than snuggling with the boys on a lazy morning.
22- I no longer care for my mom's meatloaf. Blech.
23- I am ready to move out.
24- I still sometimes miss my ex-BFF. Only sometimes.
25- I do NOT want to be pregnant in the summer. EVER. AGAIN.

Voila! Now you know a little bit more about me. It wasn't at all painful, was it?

Good times.

Well...

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Sun, 13 Jul 2008 04:17:00 +0000

I forgot I cheated and put up a graphic for a post. That sucks. I was planing on doing that now. Saturdays are very long for me. I work from 10 to 6. And we are usually very busy. Fortunately that was not the case today.

But I'm still tired. I'll be back tomorrow with some witty story, or something.

Don't ask...

noreply@blogger.com (Jenny H.) — Sat, 12 Jul 2008 04:50:00 +0000

More Comments and Myspace Layouts at pYzam.com

Yes, this is SO cheating. Bite me.